it is Monday afternoon
and i am now home
after my procedure
i figure i'll write
before the numbing agents completely wear off
i am assuming
that from the title of this post
you are fully aware
that some personal 'breasticular' details
will be forthcoming
you have been warned
7:00 AM-i wake up
blink at the clock
and wish i could fall back asleep
but as i know
this will not likely happen
out of bed i roll
the very first think i think about upon waking
is The Biopsy
the very first words i breathe are
Lord, make it all come out okay
7:03 AM-pee
7:15 AM-i eat a bowl of cheerios with skim milk
whilst thinking about The Biopsy
7:30 AM-open up the laptop
to check my email
7:31 AM-continue to be overwhelmed
as still more you leave comments of encouragement
and prayer
7:47 AM-pee
8:00ish AM-shower and dry off
look longingly at my stick of deodorant
before tucking it in my bag to bring with
8:10 AM-start choosing my biopsy outfit
a sports bra is required
and i know i'll be leaving with an ice pack
on one side
so nothing snug-fitting
it's cool outside
but sunny
shorts?
jeans?
i finally choose a loose Gap top
with denim shorts
and a little yellow cardigan
because i am usually chilled when i'm nervous
and i have to pee a lot
8:30 AM-pee
8:32 AM-make some ice packs
by soaking and wringing out maxi pads
and putting them into freezer
8:37 AM-pee
8:50 AM-change into jeans
because i'm chilled
and nervous
8:51 AM to 9:50 AM-do some laundry
and tidy up a bit
pee a few more times
munch a slice of toast
in the hopes i won't get too hungry
during the procedure
9:55 AM-hubs arrives home
and we kill some time until we go
10:10 AM-leave for the health center
10:29 AM-pull into parking lot
Chad reaches for my hand
and prays for The Biopsy to go well
for the doctor to have skilled eyes and hands
and for benign results
but all the while
committing any outcome into His hands
and praying that we will give glory to God
in all circumstances
10:35 AM-check in and head to the bathroom to pee
10:45 AM-nurse calls my name
and escorts me back to the changing room
to shed my top
and don my smock
i go sit in the hushed waiting room
to listlessly flip through Vogue again
notice that my knee can't stop
jigging up and down with nerves
11:05 AM-different nurse calls my name
and tells me to follow her
(i later learn
that she's not a nurse
but an RT)
asks if i need to use the restroom
i do
of course
and then she takes me into The Room
i sit down
and feel as though i'm going to blub
so i blink a lot
and manage to hold it back
afraid that if i start
it'll be those heaving, ugly sobs
that i won't be able to stop
the RT gives me consent forms
and answers some remaining questions i have
she is gentle
with kind eyes
and i like her
despite the fact that her nickname is
Bunny
true as you live
11:25 AM-doctor comes in
and introduces himself
he seems proficient
if somewhat lacking in personality
he goes through the biopsy procedure
and potential side effects
before handing me one more consent form
i don't like or dislike him
but feel comforted that he will do a good job
the doctor leaves
and
Bunny
helps me onto a table like this
that hole that you see
is where my left breast will dangle
let me tell you
that the most uncomfortable thing
about this whole procedure
was just lying still for 25 minutes
flat on my stomach
with my head wrenched to one side
once i'm in the required position
she raises the table
so a smaller mammography machine
can scoot in to image my breast
this is so that she can pinpoint
the exact location of the calcifications
for the doctor to insert the vacuum-assisted device (VAD)
for the extraction
when she's through taking the films
the doctor returns
to begin The Biopsy
however
he wants a few more films
with my breast in a different position
which they get
and then they are ready to proceed
the doctor informs me what he's about to do
at each step
starting with
an iodine swab
then a needle prick
for the numbing agent
which burns for a second
he then warns me to stay very still
and that i will feel a 'jolt'
which i assume
is the needle penetrating
i do
but it doesn't hurt
he then proceeds to switch on the VAD
for the extraction
he spends about 10 minutes
extracted tissue
intermittently taking films
and checking them
to be sure he's gotten enough good sample
for the pathology lab
at some point
he inserts a tiny metal chip
that will remain in my breast
to be a marker for where
the calcifications were found
for future mammograms
when The Biopsy is over
they take a couple more films
to check the breast for remaining calcifications
of which
they find none
finished
the doctor comes around
to my sight line
and briefly pats my shoulder
assuring me that everything went very well
i thank him
and he leaves
my neck and shoulder are killing me
and i really have to pee
but Bunny says i'll have to stay where i am
for a few minutes more
for my breast to be compressed
to allow the (little) bleeding to stop
after a few minutes she checks again
and says
just a few minutes more
i really have to pee now
and my neck feels painfully fused
in its twisted position
finally
finally
she checks again
and i'm good to go
she removes the machine
that has been compressing by breast
for the last 45 minutes
ahhh
and helps me turn over onto my back
ahhhhhhh
the small motion of rolling over
has started the bleeding again
so she puts gauze and pressure on my breast
and we wait some more
then she tapes me up
helps me up and over to a chair
gives me my post procedure instructions
and walks me to the bathroom
ahhhhhhhhhh
12:30ish PM-i sit in the waiting room
because i have to get one more mammogram
before leaving
i'm also waiting for the pain to surface
which it will soon
12:45 PM-Bunny comes back
to take me to Mammo Room 3
where she takes two more films
that almost hurt
but not really
and then tapes an ice pack
to my breast
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
1:00 PM-head back to the changing room
to shed smock
and don my sports bra
Gap top
and
deodorant
holla
1:10 PM-after asking me for the 7th time
are you sure you're okay?
which i assure her that i am
i can finally leave
walking back into the main waiting room
i find Chad working away on his laptop
he looks up
and immediately asks
are you okay you look really pale
i assure him that i am
and we leave together
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
he asks me how it went
and i describe it to him
Reader's Digest condensed version
1:30 PM-we stop at Sheetz
to get MTOs to eat in the park
i am starting to feel some more pain
and am glad to get home
to pop a couple of extra strength Tylenol
and pull a maxi pad ice pack
out of the freezer to tuck into my bra
i fully intend to follow the doctor's instructions
to the T
and stay planted on the sofa
for the remainder of the day
4:00 PM-get another maxi slash ice pack
and begin writing this post
and now the real waiting begins
i should have the lab results
in 3 to 5 days
which we all know
really means 6
before i stop
i want to say
thank you
to all of you who left words of
encouragement and hope
and prayed for me
and my left breast
and one more thing
i am glad
today is almost over
and i am now home
after my procedure
i figure i'll write
before the numbing agents completely wear off
i am assuming
that from the title of this post
you are fully aware
that some personal 'breasticular' details
will be forthcoming
you have been warned
7:00 AM-i wake up
blink at the clock
and wish i could fall back asleep
but as i know
this will not likely happen
out of bed i roll
the very first think i think about upon waking
is The Biopsy
the very first words i breathe are
Lord, make it all come out okay
7:03 AM-pee
7:15 AM-i eat a bowl of cheerios with skim milk
whilst thinking about The Biopsy
7:30 AM-open up the laptop
to check my email
7:31 AM-continue to be overwhelmed
as still more you leave comments of encouragement
and prayer
7:47 AM-pee
8:00ish AM-shower and dry off
look longingly at my stick of deodorant
before tucking it in my bag to bring with
8:10 AM-start choosing my biopsy outfit
a sports bra is required
and i know i'll be leaving with an ice pack
on one side
so nothing snug-fitting
it's cool outside
but sunny
shorts?
jeans?
i finally choose a loose Gap top
with denim shorts
and a little yellow cardigan
because i am usually chilled when i'm nervous
and i have to pee a lot
8:30 AM-pee
8:32 AM-make some ice packs
by soaking and wringing out maxi pads
and putting them into freezer
8:37 AM-pee
8:50 AM-change into jeans
because i'm chilled
and nervous
8:51 AM to 9:50 AM-do some laundry
and tidy up a bit
pee a few more times
munch a slice of toast
in the hopes i won't get too hungry
during the procedure
9:55 AM-hubs arrives home
and we kill some time until we go
10:10 AM-leave for the health center
10:29 AM-pull into parking lot
Chad reaches for my hand
and prays for The Biopsy to go well
for the doctor to have skilled eyes and hands
and for benign results
but all the while
committing any outcome into His hands
and praying that we will give glory to God
in all circumstances
10:35 AM-check in and head to the bathroom to pee
10:45 AM-nurse calls my name
and escorts me back to the changing room
to shed my top
and don my smock
i go sit in the hushed waiting room
to listlessly flip through Vogue again
notice that my knee can't stop
jigging up and down with nerves
11:05 AM-different nurse calls my name
and tells me to follow her
(i later learn
that she's not a nurse
but an RT)
asks if i need to use the restroom
i do
of course
and then she takes me into The Room
i sit down
and feel as though i'm going to blub
so i blink a lot
and manage to hold it back
afraid that if i start
it'll be those heaving, ugly sobs
that i won't be able to stop
the RT gives me consent forms
and answers some remaining questions i have
she is gentle
with kind eyes
and i like her
despite the fact that her nickname is
Bunny
true as you live
11:25 AM-doctor comes in
and introduces himself
he seems proficient
if somewhat lacking in personality
he goes through the biopsy procedure
and potential side effects
before handing me one more consent form
i don't like or dislike him
but feel comforted that he will do a good job
the doctor leaves
and
Bunny
helps me onto a table like this
that hole that you see
is where my left breast will dangle
let me tell you
that the most uncomfortable thing
about this whole procedure
was just lying still for 25 minutes
flat on my stomach
with my head wrenched to one side
once i'm in the required position
she raises the table
so a smaller mammography machine
can scoot in to image my breast
this is so that she can pinpoint
the exact location of the calcifications
for the doctor to insert the vacuum-assisted device (VAD)
for the extraction
when she's through taking the films
the doctor returns
to begin The Biopsy
however
he wants a few more films
with my breast in a different position
which they get
and then they are ready to proceed
the doctor informs me what he's about to do
at each step
starting with
an iodine swab
then a needle prick
for the numbing agent
which burns for a second
he then warns me to stay very still
and that i will feel a 'jolt'
which i assume
is the needle penetrating
i do
but it doesn't hurt
he then proceeds to switch on the VAD
for the extraction
he spends about 10 minutes
extracted tissue
intermittently taking films
and checking them
to be sure he's gotten enough good sample
for the pathology lab
at some point
he inserts a tiny metal chip
that will remain in my breast
to be a marker for where
the calcifications were found
for future mammograms
when The Biopsy is over
they take a couple more films
to check the breast for remaining calcifications
of which
they find none
finished
the doctor comes around
to my sight line
and briefly pats my shoulder
assuring me that everything went very well
i thank him
and he leaves
my neck and shoulder are killing me
and i really have to pee
but Bunny says i'll have to stay where i am
for a few minutes more
for my breast to be compressed
to allow the (little) bleeding to stop
after a few minutes she checks again
and says
just a few minutes more
i really have to pee now
and my neck feels painfully fused
in its twisted position
finally
finally
she checks again
and i'm good to go
she removes the machine
that has been compressing by breast
for the last 45 minutes
ahhh
and helps me turn over onto my back
ahhhhhhh
the small motion of rolling over
has started the bleeding again
so she puts gauze and pressure on my breast
and we wait some more
then she tapes me up
helps me up and over to a chair
gives me my post procedure instructions
and walks me to the bathroom
ahhhhhhhhhh
12:30ish PM-i sit in the waiting room
because i have to get one more mammogram
before leaving
i'm also waiting for the pain to surface
which it will soon
12:45 PM-Bunny comes back
to take me to Mammo Room 3
where she takes two more films
that almost hurt
but not really
and then tapes an ice pack
to my breast
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
1:00 PM-head back to the changing room
to shed smock
and don my sports bra
Gap top
and
deodorant
holla
1:10 PM-after asking me for the 7th time
are you sure you're okay?
which i assure her that i am
i can finally leave
walking back into the main waiting room
i find Chad working away on his laptop
he looks up
and immediately asks
are you okay you look really pale
i assure him that i am
and we leave together
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
he asks me how it went
and i describe it to him
Reader's Digest condensed version
1:30 PM-we stop at Sheetz
to get MTOs to eat in the park
i am starting to feel some more pain
and am glad to get home
to pop a couple of extra strength Tylenol
and pull a maxi pad ice pack
out of the freezer to tuck into my bra
i fully intend to follow the doctor's instructions
to the T
and stay planted on the sofa
for the remainder of the day
4:00 PM-get another maxi slash ice pack
and begin writing this post
and now the real waiting begins
i should have the lab results
in 3 to 5 days
which we all know
really means 6
before i stop
i want to say
thank you
to all of you who left words of
encouragement and hope
and prayed for me
and my left breast
and one more thing
i am glad
today is almost over